Whether it’s your choice or your partner’s, or you’ve made the decision together, deciding to separate from a partner can make you feel as if your entire world has been turned upside down, and nothing will ever feel normal again. But there is light at the end of the tunnel. Once the separation is complete, you can start building a happy life on your own.
However, separating from a partner isn’t as straightforward as you’d think. You can’t simply pack your bags and leave. Instead, there are lots of things you must think about before your separation can be made final, including the things below:
1. Consider visiting a Counselor
Unless you’re confident that you want to separate from your partner, it might be a good idea to go for couples’ counseling. This will help you establish whether or not you want to separate. Many relationships have troubles, and while some troubles cannot be overcome, others can. Instead of separating from your partner, you can work on your issues with a counselor and strengthen your relationship.
2. Think about the Children
If you and your partner have decided that separation is the best option, the first and most important thing you must consider (if you have any) is the children. You must think about what is best for your children, including how often they see each parent and where they should live. Unless there is abuse in the relationship, it’s essential that your children spend time with both parents. This blog post on how to decide the best arrangements for shared child custody has some useful information.
3. Where will you Live?
The next thing you need to decide is where you will live. When deciding who stays and who leaves the family home, it’s crucial to think about your long-term goals. In most cases, the person who will be the children’s primary carer stays in the family home.
4. Understand the Legal Side
If you’ve been with your partner for many years and have shared everything, including bank accounts, you must find out where you stand legally. Between you, you will need to work out the financial liabilities and assets of the relationship. This allows you to see what money you have available to you.
5. Change your Next of Kin
Most people in the US have their partner or spouse as their next of kin. If this is the case for you, you will need to change it to someone else. You could ask a friend or family member if they will be your next of kin until you decide who you want it to be.
6. Get Legal Advice
You may need legal advice if your partner doesn’t want to separate amicably. While legal advice can be expensive, it can save you thousands in the long run.
When you first decide to separate from a partner or start thinking about getting a divorce, it can be hard to imagine life feeling normal again; but it will.
