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Respect for a loved one is a specific prerequisite for strong and happy relationships. Usually, at the beginning of a romance, people rarely think about it. Everything works out well, and the partner seems to be a perfect soulmate. But it lasts until a certain moment. Relationships in a couple are rarely serene. In conflicts, quarrels, and even in everyday communication, both men and women often engage in personalities. Lack of respect becomes a problem.
Why is respect in relationships so important?
Disrespect for a partner destroys his or her sense of self-worth and love which once united you. Relations in which one or both partners are not perceived as personalities are full of pain and suffering. Of course, such relationships can persist for years, but this is hardly what you have dreamed about.
In our life, there are plenty of examples of disrespect for a loved one. The origins of this mass disrespect for each other are in our past: several generations grew up under the slogan “The alphabet is not started with the letter I” when respect for a person was an empty phrase, and a person was perceived as a function, a machine for performing important state tasks.
But let’s get back to a partner. What does the victim of disrespect feel? Their feelings, thoughts, suggestions, needs, and life impulses become worthless again and again. They are hurt, begin to mistrust their own powers, and defend themselves by taking offense, ignoring, and becoming aggressive. One day, they can even break up the relationship. So, you should learn how to respond to ghosting.
Such behavior is a natural reaction to any manifestation of disrespect. But, as a rule, the result of such actions is dismal: love hides in alarm. Sometimes, it takes a long https://datingbrides.com/blog/relationships/what-is-ghosting-in-dating-and-how-to-respond-to-it/time for this fragile feeling to return to the relationship. The price of disrespect is high.
For what we should respect each other?
What does genuine respect look like in a relationship? Erich Fromm wrote about it, “Respect is not fear and awe; it means the ability to see a person as he is, in all his individuality and originality.”
To respect means to recognize the autonomy of the other: the partner is not your property, function, or thing. Respect contains the rejection of the desire to remake a person and recognition of his right to act in accordance with his wishes, not yours.
To respect means to treat the other carefully, tenderly, and attentively, as the greatest value. And you should treat him in such a way not for what he has done (in other words, “deserved”), but for his personality. Respect in relationships is the foundation for love.
What does respect in a relationship depend on?
There are two sides: yours and your partner’s. If you are respectful, attentive to yourself, know how to appreciate yourself, see your own unique features and characteristics, and can protect yourself, then most likely, respect in relationships is not a problem for you.
And if everything is just the opposite? If you do not approve yourself well in everyday life? If you do not have the strength to express your point of view or true feelings? If it’s hard for you to show that people shouldn’t treat you so disrespectfully, and you won’t let it happen? Then, probably, disrespect is a task that you still have to solve. However, the game is worth it: respect is a way to happy relationships.
What can help?
A clear and firm feeling inside helps you to repulse any disrespectful appeal. Tell yourself “I am here too. And I will not allow anyone to treat me badly.” If there is such a statement, then protecting yourself from disrespect and demanding decent treatment becomes as natural as the need to satisfy hunger or get enough sleep.
However, it happens in a different way. You can confidently assert your right to be treated with respect but be hurt by disrespectful expressions from your loved one again and again. Here, you may encounter what is no longer in your power. The personal characteristics of your loved one that do not allow them to treat you properly. And then the question is completely different, to accept the actual state of things or to break such a relationship.
To sum up
Respect in a relationship requires some self-improvement, but everyone is able to do it. We wish that respect become an integral part of your romantic relationships and life!