Why Modern day relationships don’t work?

Love is just blind till it happens but after that nothing is clearer. That is when we know if it’s actually love or a mere infatuation. I guess this is exactly why our modern-day relationships or love stories don’t last. Most of the Desi wedding functions last longer than our modern-day relationships. What is the thing that causes failures in our relationships, why do we have so many divorces and break-ups taking place in our society? The answer just doesn’t lie on cheating or adultery but lies way deeper than it.


Biggest Misconception

Who says love makes you strong? It for sure makes you weak, weak in your knees. It makes you irrational, stupid, gives you the guts for all the weird things. But it’s worthwhile. Worthwhile only if it lasts, if it’s worth your efforts. Love is never easy, and not worth every time. We need to know that not that every deep conversation is a sign of love. A moment of skipping our heartbeat after seeing someone isn’t love. A moment of kind gesture isn’t love. We tend to confuse any random cliché Bollywood scene accidently happening with a random person in our college/workplace as something that should be carried forward. Not every deep conversation or matched vibe means love.  These things don’t define a forever. The problem with this generation is that the person we connect slightly with is counted upon to date. Every other cute boy or girl is love at first sight for us and getting into a relationship seems the best idea at that time however as the actual self is revealed, it all turns into regrets.

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Wanting to stay considered as a sign of Weakness

Our picture of a strong woman is of the one who leaves the relationship as soon as she feels disrespected. No doubt that respect is one of the foundations of a perfect relationship but nothing is perfect, is it? We as humans, our behavior, our opinions, our actions, nothing is perfect and honestly, it doesn’t matter till our intentions are. To err is human and there are mistakes that all of us make as humans but what defines our true character is if we really feel the same as we do in the fit of rage than when we are in our logical sense. We need to understand that wanting to keep a relationship going and not breaking it due to slight misconceptions isn’t a weakness but one of the biggest strength one can have.

Modern-Day Concept

In today’s time, love is nothing more than casual dating wherein both decide to part ways after a certain point of time or to put it better when they get bored of each other. And the fact which can’t be ignored is, the online dating apps like Tinder are killing real romance big-time.

I remember when once a guy who liked me asked his best friend to convince me. Her words confused me more than the scientific theories I had learned in school. She wanted me to “date” that boy but told me to cover my heart as according to her first love never lasts. “You both will break up, but it will be okay it’ll be worth the sweet memories you will have with him”. That was the day I had lost all faith in the modern-day concept of love. Casual relationships can be justified if both admit to it, but does that always happen? There is always one who wants a forever, a one who is serious who wants commitment and the casualness of the relationship ruins it all. It’s high time we get that not all modern-day concepts are good for us.

Sacrifice and reality is so old school!

Efforts, sacrifice, and adjustments do not seem to be the important part but more of a burden or oppression these days. Love has lost its actual spark in today’s time. It’s more of Instagram and Facebook posts than real life scenarios. Sacrifices and adjustments have become more of an epitome for helplessness and not the true elements of love. It’s well explained in one of my favorite post of an old couple being asked how they managed to stay together for 65 years to which they said that they were from the time when something broke, it was fixed and not thrown away.

The concept of Falling in love many times till we find the right one.

Honestly love isn’t a cuisine that you have to give so many trials to find your favorite one. It’s something that needs to be given time because after all, it’s something which affects your emotions, you as a person, your personality as a whole. I have seen people fall in love and legit fall when actually you’re supposed to rise in love. Most of the teenage love is completely out of infatuation and more than doing any good it has been taking an adverse effect on our mental health.

Wrapping up…

The point of the entire post is not to be directing the thought process of the readers against the concept of love as love definitely is a beautiful thing but needs time and patience and understanding and not just good looks or falling in due to irrationality and it can all be summed up in Erich Fromm’s quote, “Immature love says, ‘I love you because I need you.’ Mature love says, ‘I need you because I love you.’” So it’s time we understand the true essence of love than just merely falling for infatuations. Also, let us know in the comments section what are your thoughts on this issue.

Anam Mirajkar
Anam Mirajkar

Anam Mirajkar is a media student from Mumbai, part of the editorial team at LAFFAZ. Loves exploring the startup ecosystem and also writes about culture and entertainment.

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